YOU CAN MICROWAVE POPTARTS!?!??!
i think i want to fuck a midget just to see how difficult it would be
I just saw a woman point to her daughter and scream at her husband THIS IS YOUR GENES, THIS IS YOU.
No.. It's totally over.. He deleted the poke I sent him.. That makes it official.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
got delayed, meet you at the bar soon, found a shopping cart, i am now getting pushed to the bar by some guy that was peeing in the alley i found the cart in
Don't mind the bowl full of ashes in the sink. I meant to set that on fire.
im at work. we just had a random 14-year-old amish girl come in and gift us with cinnamon rolls as thanks for letting her use the bathroom. i dont even know.
we were hooking up and then he goes "you can touch my penis" and i laughed too hard to do anything. no second date.
according to last night, I underestimated the size of my mouth and the possibilities of what can fit into it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't know, I think having hemorrhoids shows character. You have to be trying pretty hard to get them.
I had the bathroom of girls sing you happy birthday while you puked. I couldn't stop laughing. They were all so supportive
Probably going to live on vodka sodas and fireball shots
you were so high you asked for half double stack and half crispy chicken sandwich "welded together" in the wendy's drive through
You were laying on the floor coloring a "get well soon' card for your liver...
I party with great urgency now.
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