There is an asian family here, I heard the mom call her son onyong
I don't think cute and don't forget to get tested belong in the same text
i awoke yet another morning with penis breath. ive been so generous santa has to bring me a shit ton of presents
Yeah she is in it for the money, wait til she finds out i am broke and the sex doesnt get better
She is wearing lilly and pearls while drinking natty from a monogrammed coozie. If that isn't a sorosititue I don't know what is
i would eat my own dick if it were covered in nutella
We have to use a contraceptive. God help the world if another one of us comes into fruition.
IM A DRUNK BIRTHDAY CLEOPATRA MESS. CELEBRATE THAT BITCH
Yeah I mean its Vermont, not like id be the first guy to trade pharmaceutical services for beer
Oh no I would never do that to her. But when you're single again let me know. Cheating penis is definitely better than single penis. But she has claws.
Have the decency to NOT HANG YOU'RE USED CONDOM ON THE FOOSEBALL HANDLES! Dickhead.
I'm not sure if it was the 11 shots or your naturally vibrant personality but I recall you being quite noisy that evening
Well... I got her number now... I think she is a dish best served drunk
Last night I watered my lawn and smoked a joint then cooked a steak. I'm really killing this adulthood thing.
I think I just shit out all my problems.
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