It was amazing what she could do with her one good arm.
some kid came into the principals office and tried to explain what he was sent there for through interpretive dance.
is it mean to send ur x his condoms back because they are too small for ur new boyfriend?
I used the word aforementioned in my paper. That's an automatic A in community college.
29 Frat Parties That Got Way Too Out Of Control
I just saw a kid drop his lollipop on the floor of best buy, kick it because he was pissed off and then pick it up and eat it. I think I have a long lost son.
She was so wet my fingers were literally pruney when I got done with her
i want to get drunk and sing the national anthem on your roof again please.
You act like I'm the first person to try and hook up with a blind chick.
I just found out my college boyfriend's nickname is actually a Dutch word for little cucumber.....it all makes sense now.
15 Ridiculous Ways Broke People Managed to Make a Buck
As I was about to go to sleep he asked me if I was ready to 69. HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK AT HIM IN THE FACE OVER DINNER TOMORROW
Got a traffic ticket on the way home.. Literally cost me $171 to give him a blowjob. I swear the officer could smell the cum in my hair.
EVERYTHING IS DISNEY. Even my sexting can lead to Disney.
These flip flops mean I'm casual, but I'm here to fuck.
I'm rolling and just noticed that the thread count on these sheets is horrendous.
Celebrated Veteran's Day by getting a Marine (who just got back from deployment in the middle east) drunk and laid for the first time in 6 months. #Murica