Kareoke will never be a sober sport
I just got hit by a car and apologized to the driver. I asked him if he was okay.
would it be inappropriate to describe you with the phrase "bigass titties"?
It's like eating cereal and milk but instead of cereal it's gummy bears and instead of milk it's vodka.
These 19 Underage Drinkers Epicly Got By With A Horrible Fake ID
We've already decided our costumes for next Halloween. She's going as Cookie Monster and I'm going as Elmo. She's just going to ask for Oatmeal Cookie shots, and I'm asking for Red-Headed Slut shots.
Dude, its January.
We're going to do the voices too.
Does having a sippy cup full of wine, at an outlet mall, qualify you as 'having a problem'?
Standing in a circle of girls fistpumping to the word "hospital" while taking shots.... I don't see this ending well, but its fucking fun.
I need to stop treating my body like that of a Vegas hooker on vacation in Ibiza
That's all? I'm a pro at gay chicken. I'll touch his dick, I have no problem with that.
These Are The 21 Strangest Sexual Fantasy Confessions
also, made a drinking game out of my birthday photos....drink everytime alcohol is in a photo. going through all 350 of them.
That's like the cock version of a mortal kombat fatality.
Trying to roll joints on a seadoo in the middle of a lake on a windy night. -Juststonerthings
But wait then while giving his drive thru order he goes in mid sentence, "Hey baby it's Travis remember me?"
I asked him for something to clean up with after sex and he handed me a sham wow. A SHAM WOW
Dude. He almost took three different girls home, all while dressed up as Amy Winehouse. If he goes as Kurt Cobain next weekend, we're screwed.