I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
I peed while puking? Even better
Yes you most deff did. Ultimate multi tasker you are
How do 1 in 4 women misread a pregnancy test; how stupid are women?
Same, I didn't even get to be tarzan this summer
woman puking in liquor store parking lot at 9:30 on a tuesday morning = best commute ever.
Apparently it costs $70 to clean vomit off the side of our apartment building.
Two dudes got up on top of the pianos and danced shirtless. They didnt even get kicked out. I love vegas
The police woke me up so they had no choice but to see my morning wood.
Apprently after I bit that bouncer, it all went down hill.
As if right now I am a humanitarian. Full story to come in the morning. It involves sex.
I really wanna just be like, can you just eat me out and stop whining
I think that would solve a million problems
I had to break it to her that she was not in fact behind the bushes when she peed on the church last night
Overheard-"sex" and "giblet gravy" in the same sentence. Best thanksgiving ever.
That moment during finals day when you either convince your teacher to let you out of the room or you shit you pants.
Hey mike is locked out, sleeping on the common room couch, no idea where his pants are nor does he know where he is. When you get this let him in? And let me know ur alive too!
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