I wish guys would just cum water 'cause you don't have to worry about being pregnant and it'd be like a squirt gun fight
Don't judge me. He's really sexy for a 17 year old. We made nasty in the womens bathroom at the beach. Don't worry. I wore sandals in there.
None of that is ok.
so if i die before i go back to school its because the thing we found in the hallway that i've been smoking out of is a crack pipe
I got spanked with a cardboard tube. Apparently he used to be a percussionist. Who favored marching band tunes. It was weird.
he fucked my hip out of place.
Part of my whole not being a slut anymore involves not giving other peoples boyfriends blowjobs
We didn't have a blender so we made the margaritas by running over a garbagebag full of ice with the car and then stirring it with a knife in a French-press coffee pot. CAN YOU SAY RESOURCEFUL?
you left me with this keg alone. this is on your hands
He dodged my hug and greeted me with a fist bump. I slept with him the night before. The only thing worse would have been a greeting by chest bump.
I love shooting for the middle. Those girls never wake up well.
What we have is to special to throw away over a woman who spreads her butt cheeks on a pool table for me...
you know it's been too long when the heat of a pizza box on your lap turns you on.
As a courtesy going forward if you could not bang in my house that would be nice
Already doing pt exercises by picking my margarita up off the night stand. Fuck yeah.
My boss walked into my office and gave me a toothbrush and tips for dealing with sex hair. She knows what’s up
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