When i light up a cigarette people look at of like i'm going to pee on their children.
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
and then you made a playlist that was just "party in the usa" on repeat...
I just puked in a penis shaped cake pan. I've hit an all new low for a Tuesday.
Just saw your girl from last night... Be embarrassed
I asked you how much you drank and you replied with "I don't know what kind of toothpaste I use."
she drove 3 hrs one way just to sleep with me. I felt bad complaining about paying for condoms.
you took a potato out of your pocket and just started eating it raw. don't know where the potato came from though
21st birthday = success
Steve watched craig and I have sex from the top level of his cat tower this morning.
She just asked me if I was going to stay the night. I responded "I know that we are upside down".
I'll just give him your contact info, and you'll somehow manage to get laid. Which will make me feel like your vagina's agent or something.
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
I went from swearing off of sex to planning a threesome. It's been a rollercoaster of a day.
I don't know if I'm dying or this is just a mild inconvenience
I think I broke my dick but 10/10 would definitely do it again.
Randomize
