He made a note in his iPhone tonight so that he would remember that I rejected him.
Just so you know you don't have to worry about me picking up any guys tonight. The Hilton is hosting guests from the North American Gay Volleyball Association and the Comic Palooza
hey, its the girl who gave you a bloody nose and paid you back with a blow job. have you seen my shoes?
she just stared at nothing and then looked at me and goes, "that's a weird place to put the wall"
Just visited the liquor store.... for the 4th time today. shits gonna get weird
I told him to just roll me a blunt and put it in a heart shaped box.
we got kicked out of the bar last night for sneaking into the back kitchen and eating handfulls of cheese in the walk in fridge
Did you know they have a bouncer at Applebee's because I did not
You started pulling out condoms from your fanny pack and threw them at all the couples on the beach
He tried to get me to go back to his place on the condition that he has 6 cats. I was very tempted but I said no. Hoping to go see the cats tomorrow
He found out about your side hoe and still helped you try to find a lizard that got in the house
How do I send someone an apology text for giving them a lap dance in the middle of a party last night?
Not sure who they are or where we're going but they just bought me 3 tacos so I'm staying.
Well, I just puked in the shower in case anyone wants an update on how my day is going
I got up and left his place at 3am because I remembered I had a burrito in my car.
Randomize
