Had a 3 sum last night, and today food just taste better and the air seems so much fresher!
I had it in my eyebrows, my bangs, under one eye, and across both cheeks. Congratulations on the successful and elusive warpaint cumshot.
she was pretty happy for someone in the middle of a herpes outbreak, how was i supposed to know?
This is one of those times where I really wish my vagina could tell me what happened last night.
I found a digiorno pizza in my washing machine.
i promise the blood crusted on your tits is from him motorboating you after he tripped into the pool stick. nothing else.
Its okay, i dont mind you drinking, im just surrounded by it, there is some random dude laying on your couch with a bucket that ive never seen before
Now that makes it sound like you had sex with a guy in batman costume and you never took the mask off so you can't 100 percent be sure.
I'm turning into an adult here.
Adults touch each other's special zones.
Sooooooo, can scratch getting a pelvic exam by a man dressed as Woody from Toy Story off my list.
You need to write an essay about this experience.
He was even wearing the hat.
This is the fifth time tonight that girl has taken off my pants. Take me home. Now.
meow
use your words like a big girl
i ran over your cat.
Does the girl you just banged want anything from Taco Bell?
Turns out I made out with a woman dressed as a unicorn here 10 years ago
we found her on the beach half naked talking to a palm tree
Which half?
Randomize
