I need to shower the guilt off of my thighs.
And I just threw up at the table during Mother's Day Brunch.
You gave him head? He fingered you? A little bit of make out?
WHAT THE FUCK ITS LIKE YOU WERE THERE
my life trainwreck boards at 9:30
Three of the best words ever! Cocaine. Research. Study.
Did I hear correctly when it sounded like he said "just don't let me throw up into your vaj?"
Well, I just hope you know I had your best interests at heart when I put your sandwich down my pants.
At beerfest, hammered, going to try to not get naked in public but i cant make any promises
4 months of living in europe has taught me the art of making a drunken stumble look like a dance move
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
btw I told him that the only way he was gonna get to eat you out was if he smothered your vag with grits..
She doesn't even know his real name...he just keeps calling himself Hans the Third
I know I don't have feelings for him because I feel completely ashamed every time after we have sex
I'm on the fast track to lesbian land
I HAD SEX WITH COLBY AND HIS FIVE YEAR PLAN IS TO STEAL A REALLY EXPENSIVE PAINTING AND ASKED ME IF ID BE INTO HELPING HIM AND I WOKE UP IN HIS BED TO A WOMANS TUBE TOP NEXT TO ME
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