At least you're going to bed with all the teeth you woke up with
Definitely got drunk and sent her a literal picture of my asshole. I titled it " you"
I'm thinking about that time I was in a trashbag and you spray painted my hair yellow
Totalylr drunk. Coveredc in cryola marker. Loving it. Straight men everywhere. Don't be surprises when I'm pregbat romorrowwwww
Well I disagree, 3 different men in my bed over my birthday was the perfect way to say goodbye to my childhood innocence
She set fire to my carpet trying to power-dry puke covered cigs with Josh's blowtorch. How she found it in the garage is beyond me but if you bring her with you again I'll shoot you myself.
Seriously, do normal people actually get work done being this hungover? No wonder the economy's in the shitter
The Angel on my shoulder is now resorting to merely reminding me that, "You will regret this later." I'm not sure if he's learning how I think or just giving up. Either way, should make life a bit more interesting.
I think that was him coming out to me. I just brushed it off
I think you are the only one slutty enough and evil enough for the job. Just go in and blue ball him. He broke my nose in Middle school. He deserves this.
He's not messing around tonight. 4 fist pumps.
He told me I remind him of his ex girlfriend but in a better more advanced way..
I wrote him a note at the end of the final. I'm hoping I can flirt my way in to an A or B
I lost my wallet so I paid for my cab ride home with a sausage sandwich I found in my purse. Must have thought it was my wallet.
he tied his pants around my leg to stop the bleeding... i think he just wanted a good excuse to take his pants off
well did it work?
it was a success in both ways.
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