That's when you crack a 10am beer
i hate that you can chart my weight gain through my facebook pictures.
Just got mistaken for a cardboard cutout ad in line at Taco Bell. New low?
Just found out I slapped a vegan in the face with meat last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
His bond is $50,000..margarita Monday might get cancelled
Were you paying girls to come up and grab my cock and tell me I look like bradley Cooper?
Ughhhh. Finnnneeeeee. I'll have sex with your brother. Sheesh. The things I do for you woman.
I really want to fuck that guy in the full wind breaker suit
He is indeed a crazy mutha fucka. But mark my words. MARK MY WORDS. My job has placed me at the same party as Tom Cruise. I. Am. Fucking. The. Crazy. Out. Of . That. Alien . Fucker.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So, seriously. How does it feel to know that you're riding a cock that was in kindergarten when you were going to prom?
You missed the winter stoner olympics last night....I got the gold in blunt rolling
My boyfriend told me that I said I wanted to "feast on her vagina"... Glad I don't remember.
You were on the train yelling, "THIS TRAIN NEEDS TO GO FASTER SO I CAN GO HAVE SEX WITH MY BOYFRIEND!!!"
wheres my face? and why is my pocket so big?
I mean...if Marco gets pregnant, it is either the spawn of Satan or the second coming of Christ (neither of which I want in my life). So let's just hope that he doesn't grow a womb and that we don't have to consider either option.
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