I'm talking handstands, sex in broad daylight, waking me up in the middle of the night. CRAZY
handstands? WTF?
she was a gymnast
go to hell.
My carpet still smells like piss and I THINK YOU KNOW WHY.
CANT TOUCH THIS JUST CAME ON MY IPOD. LOVE STEVE JOBS
Just threw up in the garbage can outside the liquor store... I'm pretty sure that's some sort of distress signal.
we came up with a wnba drinking game. take a shot every play that you could've done better. won't make it through 1st quartar
"Clean/organize my room day" turned into "Blast my old Jock Jams cds while getting high as fuck with a strobe light day"
I was expecting it to be of the "I am your vagina's reckoning" caliber.
I'm pretty sure I said "this might be the last time I'm in here" but then I took his pants off so that's a mixed message
He just pulled out my weave during sex....needless to say I'm embarrassed and in need of another shot pronto
It was technically 11... But I go by McDonald's time, if they aren't servin breakfast, it's the afternoon. Therefore I can drink
Not exactly hook line and sinker right away, but I'll give him a second chance. I should sext him me in my blue shark onesie.
When my beach tent arrives , I strongly suggest quitting our jobs and becoming homeless beach drunks
He was wearing a diaper to the party. I've never felt like such a creep in my life.
Fuck you. All I remember from last night is telling random people that I'm in a "judgement free zone" then I threw up
just saw two mice fucking on our bed...i think its time to find a new place to live
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