I really think my calling is to star in a Live Links commercial
He washed my hair whilst I gave him head in the shower. Bored or gay?
Thanks for putting pants on me last night. And for calling me a princess.
That's your penis' name. I've always referred to it as Alejandro secretly.
I kind of learned that hotels are unnecessary. Boys will just take you home, but that's tough with a group. I believe in us, though.
I was mid hand job and stopped me because he wanted to "connect" which meant putting his thumb in between my eyebrows and a hand over my heart and closing our eyes...
I'm not drunk because I think my blood just is alcohol from last night so being drunk is sober. If that makes sense
IM AT A ROOFTOP FUNDRAISER LOOKING OVER THE WHITE HOUSE I WILL NOT RUIN MYSELF
He said he didn't want to go down on me so I told him we were going to have an oral stalemate.
Well my normal tinder strategy of "Will I have sex with her when I'm sober" has been paying off
But I put cranberries and apples in my wine so it's festive drinking not suicidal drinking
His penis is the only thing worth pursuing but all the baggage attached isn't.
I’m at that point in my trip where I’m kinda hot, kinda cold and I have to remember to breathe.
I just peed on myself the semester has officially began.
SUFFER THE WRATH OF THE PISS BAG
Randomize
