but she was nice to me.
She was a fuckin STRIPPER.
Well at least he stopped keeping track of money by bottles of McCormick.
i just added no after every hockey player in my phone..
we got cut off at 8 am. He spilled his drink three times on the plane. this should be one hell of a vegas trip
Hahahahaha. That's what your stoned ass gets for eating half a bag of processed cheese at 2am.
Just tried to dig out holes in my mattress for my boobs so I could be comfortable lying down on my stomach
Who doesnt want to be Yoda? I mean seriously, how sweet would that be? Live to 400, not give a shit about love and all that, know fucking mind tricks and smoke awesome swamp weed. I'm down.
No one should ever be so high that they forget the food. That's just...its a violation of God and Nature, of the very laws that we live by!
I was going to do a cardio thing but then tacos.
Long story short if you're going to get drunk on a sailboat at night leave your phone in the car.
His favorite stripper is going to jail. He's taking it pretty hard
So I've decided that blue balls for lesbians is rainbow balls and the struggle is real
'allo, good sire. how dost thy day goeth?
oh no. you're at that weird Renaissance Festival thing again, aren't you?
I am an inebriated elf. you may fucketh off.
HE IS. YOU SHOULD TOUCH HIS BACK.
IT IS A COURTSHIP RITUAL.
THE MUTUAL BUTT TOUCH IS SACRED.
I'm very disappointed that your kitten almost ate my weed cake...
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