Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
I can't get out of the parking garage so now I'm staying downtown....Typical
Just saw my neighbor passed out in his front yard, leg stretching into the road. Full beer in his hand.
If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
he kept yelling THIS ISNT AMATEUR HOUR
Dude, seduce him with cookies. You almost turned me gay with scones. Don't be surprised when they get you laid.
Someone left their drag queen on my couch. On the plus side, he sure does know how to make a mean cup of coffee.
NOT EVEN KIDDING RIGHT NOW. THE GUY IN THE SPIDERMAN COSTUME JUST FELL OFF THE ROOF INTO A BABY POOL. GET HERE NOW!!
LET US USE OUR GENITALS TO CELEBRATE THIS VICTORY
he had a Pillsbury dough boy tattoo to remind him of his drug dealing days
I just had a guy ask me if his "jewelry downstairs" would set off the metal detector.
All I'm saying is this is the exact reason I should not be left unsupervised.
I'm glad we smoked together,that was probs the biggest sibling bonding we will ever have.
Why is there a mildly painful bruise on my back?
You slipped off the sink last night.
Why was I on the sink......?
;)
I need to go to St. Louis more often. The brides sorority sisters were practically fighting over me once they heard I work on Wall St.
Randomize
