Her sex list was a LOT longer than mine. She tried to justify it by saying '4 of those don't count because they were in the gang bang'.
I think vodka calistinics prior to and during beer olympics was a bad idea
Dont even try and act like it wasn't you who made the sex tape of my dogs.
He apologized for his naked psychotic episode and then we had goodbye sex on his sailboat
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
FUCK YOU. AH. FUCK BOTH OF US MORE BOOZE.
MAS TEQUILA.
Also they do not have any come back to america, i miss my fuck buddy cards at Hallmark.
Pierced my own nipple last night, and yes everyone did go absolutely nuts
I drew a giraffe.. But she did say that bumped that test up from a 39 to a 40. It's the little things.
She got tired so now we're making anyone who has a stupid idea go into her bedroom so she can sleepslur "good idea" or "baaaad idea." We're calling her the queen of the misguided.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm not sure what exactly you were planning, but you kept yelling that we were going to need a lot of midgets and a lawyer.
He kept kissing me on the cheek when I was pretending to sleep while he cried
Rough day
Good thing I've started drinking again
Please don't fuck the professor. We both know that won't end well.
I saw a drunk guy run across the street with an American flag between his buttcheeks.
I just volunteered myself to get tazed this should get interesting
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