May i just say it is extremely difficult to pee in a cape
ok... i just had to be reminded that people in animal costumes were feeding me shots at the bar.
It's like my butt was the only innocence I had left and now I don't even have that.
Heard puking from next door. Looks like the third floor won't be any different than the second.
Remember that mom/daughter stripper team? Well i just met the ex husband/father in AA. WOW!!!! WOW....
i have a raging boner for Saturday, day drinking is one of my top favorite things right next to alligator wrestling and blowing shit up
I was a bouncer for about 90 seconds until the real bouncers figured out that I was doing their job
I could definitely fill a shot glass w my cum
please don't
The Uber driver took us to a Waffle House. We didn't even say anything when we got in. MAGIC.
My nerves will need dicks later so.. I'll call you
I'm sorry for drunkenly throwing a spoon at you and then laughing at your pain.
He just used the word frick. Is that a possible red flag?
I would professionally fuck the shit out of her
He had a small dick anyway. I'm glad I barfed on it.
I just want cinnabon and vodka.
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