Pretty sure somebody just said 'I used to have a nipple'
that's awkward
I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
don't go back without me... they'll know i'm pooping.
May or may not have found my way onto a stripper bus. To Chicago.
I can hear the condescending tone from the atm when it asks if $3 is all I would like to deposit
this morning i checked my reflection in the toilet as i was throwing up to make sure i still had my pearl earrings on
Did everyone make it back alive?
You say that with such hope.
Is that a no?
You fell asleep with your fingers in my vagina. You made this a relationship.
What I'm trying to say is, that time you chained me to my dresser and made me beg for it was incredibly romantic.
Well I think won that argument, as the cops were leaving, they offered me a ride to the airport
Why isn't there a super hero that comes to the aide of really high kids when they kill their car battery?
I remember you fighting a small man for the last of the pizza. Was there a midget in my house last night?
I mean I puked all over three separate towns last night and I still think you're the one who should reevaluate their life.
I need you to ship me a penis cookie care package.
Was Mr. ROBOT good? I missed it. I just fucked dental hygienist on the trampoline in my backyard
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