If I was doing exactly what I wanted right now I would be getting fucked on a jet ski while listening to "When Love Takes Over" by Kelly Rowland while eating french fries.
She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
i love insurance, just had an iv with 4 bags of fluid, 2 shots of finagrin and a 2 hour nap . woke up without a hangover. all for $20
Wow that was a lesbian tornado.
Like my mouth was on his pelvis connected to his balls that's how far it was
I got kicked out of the bar but no one cared, I dont have any money so i stayed outside with the bouncer for an hour and he got so sick of me he let me back in on the condition that i cant leave my seat. VISIT ME
not much just sitting outside his bathroom door naked eating cheetoes. You?
You're the only true friend I have, if true friendship is based off who would be there for me at 4am during a boxed wine crisis.
You're getting spoiled, you better send me at least a side boob pic if you wanna see my dick dressed up as Davie Crockett.
Hes trying to fuck me on a bear rug. Not saying no.
I hope you get some kind or rare disease that makes your dick ties itself in a knot for fucking her you lucky bastard.
They think its so cute and admirable that I learned French. BITCH HAVE YOU NEVER HEARD OF GOOGLE TRANSLATE? sexting foreign bitches, there's an app for that
I have someone saved in my phone as "This Hoe Ain'tit' Loyal" and I'm missing my superman boxers. Explain.
he's the only real guy friend I've had who I've never made out with
There. There is gum on my butt cheek IT IS NOT MINE
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