Although I love the reason it was done, can you maybe not show pictures of my dick to all your friends at parties? I like to present my penis in my own special way. thanks
I wonder when walk of shame thursdays in the rain will finally make me stop drinking.
I'm going out with a guy whose nickname is Shark Week cause he'll eat anyone. I'm very excited.
I've shit my pants 4 times in 12 hours... Never trust a fart when u pass 30
say penis size is all related to how funny you are and then tell a feminist joke. if she laughs, you got double points, if she slaps you, she probably wasn't going to sleep with you anyway
One guy got his nose broke and was playing with it. Then another guy was playing beer pong off his horse.
Hungover. Have to fix everything I've broken. I'm gonna be very late.
Someone just knocked jenga into a plate of cake. I'm licking off each piece one by one.
Both of our knuckles were split open this morning when I came out of the blackout, the column on the porch has two new cracks in it, were like the redneck Super Smash Bros.
Im hitting on this chick at a stoplight when all the sudden. i notice this chick blowing some dude in the backseat.
I'm just gonna clean the house so my Mom won't think I'm hung over. I'll just start with the toilet
Our group of friends now have more broken bones than reasonable excuses for why they're broken.
I don't know where I keep finding these guys, but mi power bottoms es su power bottoms.
Well I kept shouting "you're groovy" at him and then I had a 15-minute argument with the bouncer about how many 9s there are in 100... it was definitely time to go home.
Also, in case they didn’t tell you… there is a chicken living in your old room… so I would assume cleaning that is now on them
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