I just made a friends list on fb of all the guys ive hooked up with. genius.
that awkward moment when your booty call gets snowed in at your place.
She got a digital picture frame for her birthday. FINALLY - a place for me to sneak all those penis shots I've taken with my iPhone.
When you wake up in your dorm right outside your room with the key in the door, then you will understand my pain.
Im down. Even tho your nick name intimidates my vagina.
I've already reverted to sweat pants. And lonely drinking.
Also I just took a shit at a bar so always remember that ANYTHING is possible.
Just to an Octoberfest and a sex party. Nothing wild.
Well his ex just grabbed his dick and told him yep Ill call u later
My girl came home. i was jacking off on the couch and she just starts telling me about her day, as if im not half naked with my hand on my cock.
i wear a size 32DD bra. its basically impossible for me to get a speeding ticket
He stopped in the middle of us banging in order to check in for his Southwest flight.
WHEN YOU HAVE SEX WITH A GUY FROM A DIFFERENT COUNTRY YOURE SUPPOSED TO NEVER SEE THEM AGAIN
Being on probation is a nice change of pace. It's refreshing to wake up and know what I did last night.
They offered me pot brownies in 7 minutes flat. Imagine my horror when I had to be like, are those gluten free?
Randomize
