woke up and her hair clip was clamped around my shaft
i find it sad that i can no longer sit in the back of class for fear that someone will fart into the heater again.
I showed remarkable dignity in such a compromising situation. Except I came off as sort of a blue ball giver.
I don't care if we have to swim home from the bar, Im not gonna sit home in the dark and read some fucking book
If it carries over into the weekend I would be glad to nurse your vagina back to health.
Okay! I've got my sketchbook, my purse, my coat, and a knife hidden in my cleavage. I'm ready for to meet my blind date~
I vaguely remember having a cowboy explain his belt buckle to me in the bathroom hallway
I made my own utility belt like Batman. It has a cup holder for my beer, cell phone holder, a little pocket for condoms, and a sewing kit just in case.
It's ok. I will share any beautiful men that I drug and leave unconscious on my bed. I'm that kind of friend.
I'm pretty sure I did the Macarena with a gay guy while shot gunning a beer
The bartender had to walk me home last night. New high or new low?
He just kept mumbling that he was too drunk for society and then he peed in a bush
anyways, do you want to make more embarrassing memories that im bound to remind you about later and laugh about?
when i saw him today i think my vagina did the equivalent of a stomach growl... its been to long
He’s got a big dick and a big ego. This could be fun
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