If you want to dance with a less than stellar Asian chick, I have just the girl for you.
i had to cut you off after you shoved a bunch of bottle caps in your mouth and pretended you had braces.
Ok, let's play "if you were a slut" again and try and retrace our steps last night..
His apology was sex and a subway sandwich. Strangely, I'm okay with that.
Just made macaroni burritos. Fukkin awesome. We'll have to try this when I'm sober.,!
Well. It was around 3 or 4 in the morning. He ran into the woods. Wearing moccasins. Holding an extension cord. He was trying to catch a deer. That about sums up the awesomeness of the night.
I wish we knew morse code and could knock to each other through the wall
Should have know they were on something when he started filling a Togo container with fruit
Also I stopped in the middle of the road and put my hazards on because BUNNIES WERE PLAYING
you got coffee,laid,and a sandwich. that never happens when I work
i'm just really offended he didn't want to have breakup sex. like that was the only thing i was really looking forward to
Trusting in Jesus is not a viable birth control plan.
Idk... he wears anklets.. i dont think i can get past that.
Dad is celebrating turning 45 by being drunk in a department store before two o'clock.
I did a line off of, and then danced on top of a table older than this country.
Harvard is great.
Randomize
