upper decked the toilet at the restaurant that wouldn't let me pee there yesterday
never have phone sex with a hardcore republican during this health care crisis . just dont.
She refers to my dick as princess Sarah... oddly I'm okay with that.
The little penguins are speaking with a hispanic accent. I dont know how to feel about it. Geographically speaking, this cant be possibly. This isnt cool.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you're wrong. we DID have sex last night. just ask your roommate. you seriously don't remember him asking to join us?
We should have cut you off when you asked the can driver if you could ride in the trunk.
So I think I might just embrace the awkwardness and say he fingerblasted her cause thats the greatest word in existence
I have a boner and a quesadilla why aren't you here
I just had to take my laptop away from him because he was on Amazon and had 20 Seahawks garden gnomes in his cart.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Or I could hide in your trunk so you can sneak out of putt putt for sex breaks
Yet he continued to eat cereal out of the glove compartment in my car.
I just added Tubthumping to the playlist for tonight. This is going to make or break the party.
my whole checking account just had a funeral down bourban street, paid for that, and then bought everyone 5 shots of fireball...
I don't remember what you did, but I DO remember that i'm supposed to hate you for it.
Played Gay Bar on the jukebox and pissed off the Republicans here. Best day before birthday ever.
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