It has come to my attention that I should apologize for myself and my friends
What are you doing tonight?
Watching dora the explorer and pining for a sex life.
Big sunglasses are the new paper bag
ya. and they're way easier to confince girls to wear during sex
All i remember as you were making ramen is that you kept slurring "i like you as a color"...
Just start grabbing cocks. It can't go wrong! Just say you thought you knew him and wanted to check.
well, I yelled "the tribe has spoken!" at a boatload of people and then I walked home alone in the pouring rain at 1:30am. karma really is a bitch, yo.
Apparently, "please don't I have to be in court tomorrow" is not a valid excuse for a girl to abstain from giving a massive hickey.
I'm pleased to know that your mom refers to me as "the ass piliager" now
First sex of the summer I'm winning 1-0
GET HOME NOW
Oh shit
The whole bar erupted and in happiness and confusion as I went on about pancakes.
Haha never eat brownies from a guy with batman pajamas
WE'RE MOVING TO IRELAND!!!! DON'T ASK QUESTIONS JUST BOOK THE DAMN FLIGHT!!!!
I am not walking across campus just to give you a blow job in the hopes that in return i can study more efficiently.
We are totally like Jim and Pam, except ya know, drunk and not together anymore.
You poured all their beer into ziploc baggies so it would be "better on the go"
Randomize
