He kept pouting and saying i cockblocked him and I kept yelling "I'm sorry...but the cock was never out to be blocked"
Sorry there's no emoticon for I got my period all over a guy's bed so I had to improvise. There isn't even a bed one
Every time I think about it I can feel His toe in my mouth and I gag, I'm scarred for life.
Couple of things: my nipples are blue and knowing that at some point I'm going to have to poop is incredibly terrifying
How are you not embarrassed to know me. I'm a mess right now. I'm a walking, talking tornado of embarrassment
Your text makes more sense read in reverse.
I say this as a friend, you would make a SPECTACULAR crossdresser
somebody went from crying while watching Full House, to a full on emotional raging bull...I love this time of the month
I've just been thinking about sangria a lot lately, like an adult.
I hope April is a better month for dicks. March has been very disappointing.
I woke up at 3am, top off, with campus security telling me to get dressed. Tonight was a GOOD NIGHT
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
I'm drunk but I just ate 2 heads of broccoli so does that mean it evens out?
Yes absolutlely
I just want to see you and express my feelings in a drunken manner, but in a sweet way like my english accent.
I need dick so bad, I’m dressing sexy for the school pick up line and sports practices to entice a few of the DILFs
Randomize
