Turns out I'm a social drinker... I just happen to be REALLY social.
I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
You stole her cigarette screaming that you were going to stop the air cancer from getting everyone.
at least i was looking out for everybody
he was walking around the bar drinking wild turkey and gobbling simultaneously
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What did you want me to do? You know I don't like fat people. I'm an asshole to them sober it only gets worse when I'm drunk
That doesn't make it okay! You tried kicking the girl's mom out where we were having the party at!
The fact that I woke up with my panties on the counter and a piece of pizza stuck in my sheets is what scares me.
the gays at disneyland are vicious
We boned on a bench in a park, french people were walking by cheering us on. Totally acceptable
think I signed up for a 5k last night while blackout.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Tell them to carpool to pride, have a 3way, and if one says 'no thanks' just tell em it's not gay if it happened in a 3way!
This love triangle bullshit is getting out of hand. It's now a love polygon and I want out
My desperation for dick was off put by his anime figure collection.
He wore pink swim trunks on our date and repeatedly insulted my profession, but his cat kept standing up like a person to nuzzle my face and I felt like a Disney Princess. I hate this dude, but the cat is too amazing for me to not fake interest for.
Lynn just told me "I heard about your divorce. Condoms or morning pill your choice and I'm buying". Sorry but I got plans now bro.
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
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