Dude I just peed on my pants. not in them though. and yes there is a difference
Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
My sheets, bed, and bathroom are covered in blood. She needed 14 stitches after a trip to ER. This is the last white girl I ever hookup with.
we've been doin it since '07. it's like married sex now, were both comfortable so neither of us really tries anymore, we just do it because it's convenient
do you think if she looks enough like a dude i have to come out to my parents?
Looking forward to meeting the person naked and passed out at my kitchen table.
Kristy just reminded me that I have a bottle of champagne to lick off your ass hole...... This is by way of saying that we have plans on Friday.
And then my hands went numb and no one believed me so I started putting peoples cigarettes out on them. Shitty idea i'll tell you that much
I no longer exist. I have transformed into a puddle of sex.
Btw I have come to the conclusion that we really need to do it in a bed. Like at least once..
I can't ever look his wife in the eye again. She will see right through my soul to his dick pic.
He's bringing a lesbian pretending to be his girlfriend to family Christmas. I can not wait to see how this goes.
Definitely accidentally brought drugs into Disneyland. Considering using them.
do you know of a way I can die but like NOT die? like not being unconcious, just ascending to an astral plane for a few weeks or months in real world time so i can sort my issues out away from the rigors of life kinda deal, you know?
I have to sleep with him. We're too much alike. It's like clash of the titans, except instead of clashing, he's putting it in me.
Randomize