So you coming over for some grilled cheese and head?
just took my ibuprofen with ramen broth, yay college
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
is facebook stalking your hot therapist socially acceptable?
Sunday was the 8 month anniversary when you shot me in the face...just an FYI.
knew i was gonna lose at a shoe or be bleeding at some point. and both happened within 20 mins.
I think I'm a wingman for every guy who bangs a girl I scarred in highschool.
I just sent you a multitude of sexual pictures...and you responded with a Charles Dickens Quote.
I miss her, but also fucked her ex boyfriend.... So there's that
Yeah you burned that bridge with your vagina
I don't know bro. If a girl makes you cum hard enough that you pull a back muscle, she might be the perfect one to call for a massage on said muscle.
He said he remembers me...standing on a snowy roof, smoking a blunt, yelling "you're pretty fly for a white guy" at him. Sounds about right.
you don't go into accounting for the pussy....
can we not speak foreign languages when I'm on drugs
You had a 45min conversation with the Ronald McDonald statue I have the video to prove it
havent showered in 2 days. just Febrezed my balls in the car before going into a movie alone with a 40 of Guinness.there isn't a word in English for how single I am.
Randomize
