yea ive hooked up with like half those guys
and i've hooked up with the other half...when our powers combine, we are captain slutbag
Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
So apparently I ran down the hall to another party and started handing out uncooked spaghetti to strangers. You'd be surprised how many drunk people will eat raw noodles.
It's not my theme song, it's my blowjob song. There's a difference.
Seriously man, I'm worried that my dick's going to fall off someday if I keep this up...
This whole night would have been avoided if the liquor store had air heads
Yeah I'm a responsible adult man but I legally unbind myself from anything that occurred that evening and am in no way responsible for those actions.
You texted me 'I am the leopard prince', with a series of pictures of you posing in what seemed like cat poses. you were not "a little bit" drunk dude..
Leave the bottle at home cause either way I'm not taking another shot. You have no idea how long it took me to compose this text free of grammatical error.
Gold star for you, but I'm on my way and the soco is buckled in next to me. This is happening.
i introduced myself to everyone by my new name, thundergooch. i threatened the neighbors with a hammer when they used my real name. needless to say, sailor jerry was not kind to me.
How many band members does it take to become The Band Slut? I think I might be dangerously close
is leaving the club to fk in his friends van subtle?
He showed up at my front door with Plan B and a rose...
If the sex wasn't incredible why would I compare it to cheesy tots
i'm really sorry, but i'm just not sober enough to make good decisions.
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