I was getting a bj with sports center on in the background
Da na na, na na naa
Whatever. We're stealing a penguin. Your not allowed near him... You did this to yourself.
he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
Why do my balls have what looks like rust on them?
She's the barista slut.
Rain ponchos don't count as shirts at the bar. FYI.
You said your face felt like it was made out out of boxes and kept asking me to give you a bath.
Thats why you dont have a "jubilant gunfire celebration"
I just went to add a song I had never heard before to my "high as fuck" playlist and it was already there.
But that's fine. Because I am an independent woman who is going to pull some jane Goodall shit and save the world one day......or be a porn star......either way they are going to wish they had fucked me.
He had an extremely smooth butt for a man with such rough hands.
WHY THE FUCK DOES RICKY'S BROTHER GET AN ENTIRE POT OF PASTA FOR BEING SHIRTLESS AND ALL I GET IS ARRESTED?!
I'm reading the Hobbit in my blanket fort alone with a bottle of wine... all I need is dungeons and dragons to complete this superfecta of awesome
For full disclosure: I told my roommates last night that you have a very clean asshole.
We were peeing side by side on the riverbank together and I felt like nothing brings you closer than drunken riverbank urinating so I caught her a friendship frog to wipe with since we left the tp in the canoe.
Randomize