yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
whats wrong with me. i have a coffee mug of wine in the library and i'm doing homework
just ate frosted cheerios in coffee with some marshmellows. the college diet begins
i actually just woke up with a lampshade on my head. god damn cliches.
Question: Is it too early to claim April Fools on the text "can we do some lines before the concert" that I accidentally sent Mom?
Ah, I knew it wouldn't be long before my boobs were introduced into the conversation.
I feel like somebody ate me, then shit me into my bed.
I would feel bad sleeping with her unless all of her personalities were on board with it.
All I remember is waking up with 3 penises pointed at my face. I also remember enjoying that a lot. And then I threw up in their shower.
So I'm not dead, but close call. I think I can handle one more bar.
Can you stop being a bitch and just take some Kaluha shots with me bro?!?
I decided not to look up the nudes, because I believe that there is a line, and that mocking my old classmate's horrid nudes alone crosses that line.
My date ended with her leaving the bar with that guy who used to jerk off in the back of the school bus.
His Australian accent during sex made me think I was in an Outback Steakhouse commercial
And don't worry, I have a great track record of rallying after a casual midday blackout.
Randomize