He started to lick my mole,thinking it was my nipple.
remind me next year to leave the 19 year old girl at home when you're going to pride. total cock block
I'm pretty sure I have jizz on the back of the dress I wore to church. Awesome.
no... you woke up naked next to the toilet because you said your outfit was too cute to throw up in
he called to tell me the scratches were still on his back. this was in the summer.. still the best hookup
he left me a note this morning. it said "thank you for letting me touch you"
Drunk
Deyhxbr
Fucaerrrrr
He graduated with honors. I've seen him kneeboard on dry ground and run a razor scooter into a wall...anyone can graduate with honors
I mean, I'm not looking for prince charming. I'm looking for the glass slipper of dicks.
I went back to the party but by then they were all sitting on the floor in the dark listening to we are the champions on full blast.
I was so gone I thought the cops banging on my door were kids from the party trying to get into my room... needless to say, I started moaning louder so they would take the hint.
Blacking out is all I've done this year and we're only 3 days in. Checkmate bitch.
I think it's time to give up this life and become vikings. You in?
This ice cream is 10x better than the sex I had yesterday
Worst wingman u don't do ANYTHING but laugh at my incompitant shyness
Randomize
