Bigbird is at the bar Im at. whats her name
were having a shit on karen session at work but then she walked in so we used code names instead and she tried to join in like she knew them
Hypothetical question: If I threw up in the dishwasher do I clean it up or just turn it on? :(
He wouldnt stop screaming that he wanted a trashcan WITH a lid. Whats so necassary about a lid
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think he may have overheard our "how much coke would you fuck me for" conversation last night...
The meeting is at the same hotel we go to for sex. Avoiding eye contact with all the staff there.
The bartender just asked me if I owned stock in Jameson. I've been here for less than an hour and he's already judging me.
I think im gonna bang this 35 year old at a kids birthday party in the bathroom at this house while the kids open the presents.
Dont eat ANYTHING off the floor at Matt's house. He likes floor sex.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Coming to you live from the floor of my office..
How many strippers in the world do you think have had a debate with someone about the NRA?
I forgive you, at least you vote. I found out my fuck buddy isn't even registered. I won't fuck a non respectable citizen.
As much of a hooker as I am you don't slam where you drink
When a guy asks for your ig but you already know his blood type, social security number, & mother's maiden name.
Okay so as of now, we may either be coming for one night, two nights, or not at all this weekend. It depends on Laura's toe and if I get my period. Will explain later
Randomize