Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
watching E! true Hollywood story: curse of the lottery.. i'd probably spend all my money on blow and airplanes too..
you went up to their shower, tripped in it, accidentally turned it on and then claimed that you like to "test everyone's showers"
The one wearing a viking helmet and holding a bottle of Smirnoff. She's laying on the floor of the tube singing "cant find my way home" . You can't miss her..
Standards are awful. It's like living in the zombie apocalypse. You can only have sex with certain people
Lol. Awesome. Seriously though, I need you focused next year. We're gone have a lot of drinking and stupid nonsense to do, and I don't want dumb shit like responsibility to get in my fucking way.
We can do this. We've been drunk at a gay bar, we will not be taken down by a Tuesday.
He got weirdly turned on by the video of my cat licking nacho cheese off my finger.
It's 4/20 of course I'm going to smoke in the portapotty and be ripped outta my mind at the lung cancer walk.
It's truly amazing how much porn I can get in while my phones at 1% battery life.
and then I said "oh, I see the price of Plan B has gone up". and the pharmacist looked at me very sadly. I was just trying to make conversation.
Unless your apology includes a 20 something with loose morals and a daddy complex, I'm am not interested
I fucking hate them. They came over and sat on me and made out. On top of me. Who the fuck does that?
I fucked his roommate. And that roommate's best friend. And my roommate. And my roommate's old roommate.
i'm bowing down, but slow your roll.
My last one night stand called me today. Apparently I gave him a yeast infection in his mouth. Not sure how I should feel about this.
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