I started the year with 2,800 dollars and am now down to 83 dollars-one of which i use to snort my focalin. I have given up on food and am perplexed as to how I can make 82 dollars last more than two weekends for booze
when i woke up this morning i blew my nose and ash came out.. i'm not sure what to make of this.
5 am booty call.. And I went I need to gain better control of my vagina
It's 9am. I'm four lines ahead of you already. Wake up.
Things are burning & the world smells of peanut butter. It's beautiful.
You're obviously not trying hard enough. GET LAID. Kittens die for less.
Touche salesman.
I bet his dick wears a tuxedo.
Can I send you a picture of my penis? I feel like it looks really good right now and I need someone to share it with
The Universe is CLEARLY playing a bad joke on your sex life
All I know is that I have a black eye and an extra $200 in my wallet. Other than that, clueless.
Yeah you'd pretty much be ruined if you broke up with a guy like that and then had to return to the dating pool
Do you think they manscape in the zombie apocalypse?
Just packed vodka and spare underwear into my purse- totally set for watching the hockey with him tonight
All I remember is being in the middle of the road puking and my bestfriend cheering me on from the passenger seat...
He is farting the alphabet right now. In the goddamned restaurant. You don't get to recommend men anymore. Or restaurants for that matter.
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