Seeya bye Latvian government! Whammy!
dude I just sharted for the first time ever, kind of gross
well what did you think, shitting your pants would be fun
separated laundry into 'got laid' and 'didn't get laid' piles.
I mean, keeping the tube socks on AND taking cell phone pictures that he didn't ask for during sex? that's two strikes kiddo.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the only reason you beat me in fntsy this week is bc you wouldnt bail me outa jail in time to set my roster you dick
I drank all the drinks. And jump off roof. Yay
It's ok, I may have just peed outside your car and used your whataburger napkins. Hope you weren't saving them for a special occasion.
They sent me to the hospital. Apparently, of the many things I said, I looked at the doctor and told him, "Wow... it's like you're a REAL DOCTOR!"
Is it some european holiday today? We both woke up to find loaves of bread in our rooms...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your friend, the one I told I would brush his teeth with my tongue, what's his name again?
Alls I remember is making out with that chick.
Nope that was a dude
That was obviously his first time talking dirty. He called my vagina "pretty"
There's a cute bearded guy at this brew fest wearing a kilt and selling mead
TELL HIM ABOUT MY DOWRY!!!
Can't. Way too high. Forgot how to operate doors. Stuck outside.Come get me.
Today will be the day I throw up in my backpack in the middle of class
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