this guy showed up at my house asking for his sword and cape. something tells me i shouldn't drink that much again.
how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
apparentely "Beer Pong Champ" is not a profession, no wonder they havent called me back......
told ya
All I seem to do lately is get myself off, take naked pictures and drink beer. I don't know if thats a good or bad thing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
did you mean anything you said last night? i just wnna know
no
and i was just like oh shit i'm getting felt up by a 15 year old
We got to the party at eleven, and the host was already in the hospital from being stabbed. And she brought the stabber home with us when we left.
I just stole a conducting baton from the chicago symphony orchestra... i have to stop drinking on weeknights
First booty call in Europe.. In Barcelona. With a German. In broad daylight.... Is that how they do it here?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
Just got a 200 dollar safe, two jars, and a 500 pack of rubber bands.. This doesn't SCREAM drug dealer does it?
...you should fill the cart some more
That guy I hooked up with in new york last 2 statuses are "I'm going to be a father, it's a girl" then "wow syphilis sure does burn" I'm legit scared... What has my life come to.
Man the amount of drugs being done at a wedding with a bunch of surgeons was disturbing
Last thing googled on my laptop last night was vagina chaffing. What the fuck?
Slowly dying because of my period and my phone is mocking me because I have 69% battery
Randomize