Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
Oh. He liked you.
Then you said "Are you asian?, I didn't know there was Asians in Colorado."
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
just left the emergency room. condom extraction.
and this is why we should make december sharting awareness month.
Well no need to be a stranger, even if you aren't interested in joining my bisexual polygamist marriage. New city, new friends.
If you wake up tomorrow and start to wonder.... Yes you did just eat mild sauce from taco bell out of the package while informatively yelling about the loss of my virginity
Serious question...Is it possible to get a DUI on a kayak?
In a bar surrounded by couples hooking up. I'm just staring at one. Not drunk enough. Come save me.
I could teach a class on "expressing your thanks through photos taken of yourself in the shower"
Taylor Swift needs more songs about threesomes. I'm not sure she gets me anymore.
I wrote an entire paper in under an hour about The Nightmare Before Christmas. I was also high as shit and pretty sure I dedicated half the page to the animation but still.
Will you skip merrily into hell with me?
I also woke up in a bed soaked of pee and drunkenly lectured him on the dangers of chewing tobacco... weird night
Randomize
