clearly I should have checked to see if he was an NRA member before I went back to his house and woke up in Heston's haven.
he just booty called me in advance instead of waiting til 3 am when hes trashed. i think thats really considerate and gentlemanlike.
I just ran into the couch, vagina first.
I hope you got dinner out of it
walkin around the woods blazed, drawing pictures of trees and plants, i get a grade for this
Last night I walked out of the bar got in a cab asked the cabi to circle the block. he did and brought me right back to the bar. I paid him $7 thanked him and walked back into the bar.
It was almost awkward to look at you naked while listening to Circle of Life. Just saying.
hanging out with you guys is like living the wikipedia entry for drugs...not sure i can handle that tonight.
I just wanted to share with you that my life has come to naked arts and crafts, to fix my flask, with a rum and coke in my hand... Good luck on your exam
I need to stop getting so excited when a guy unzips his pants and its bigger than my boyfriends. I look like a kid in a candy store.
Male strippers are involved. You are coming
Can you explain the plethora of sunflower seeds in the dryer?
I feel like getting drunk at the airport is sort of a rite of passage into adulthood, but maybe i should reserve that occasion for a flight thats not just 1 hr
After fooling around at the hotel til dawn, I managed to feed her with my free buffet passes. Tastes like sweet victory.
Well... This is my last night at the resort. So far, the only thing that has been in my vagina is sand.
yea, she was legit pissed that her rasberry vodka ice cubes never actually froze. but we couldnt convince her otherwise.
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