your thong is hanging out like whoa
Alarm just got pulled in my exam
Swear it wasn't me
conclusion of the day: americans need to get on tredmills, people need to learn how to flush toliets and learn how to pee in then instead of on them, and waiters shouldnt tell their life stories to customers.
his ringtone is the jonas brothers. get me the fuck out of here NOW.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So apparently when I roll on X I find 'dick ina box' not only hilarious but also sexually arousing.
I left for five minutes and Chris wound up half in women's clothes, half naked. And the naked half was covered in shamrock stickers.
she's like a sexy human version of my cat. i can't catch her, and she keeps throwing up in the corners.
Uhh dog found a condom. FYI its on the table by couch please dispose of it. No reply Necessary
Just participated in the saddest thing: Cheetos. Handjob. I have lost at life
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had to rename my dildo. I met a little kid who named his teddy bear the same name. It just felt wrong.
You drink too much. You cuss too much. You have questionable morals. You're everything I've ever wanted in a friend.
anyways, do you want to make more embarrassing memories that im bound to remind you about later and laugh about?
Baked goods and tits. Hard to go wrong there.
He kept screaming "I am the thunder!" when he was riding me.
Btw I'm playing passed out so you can get laid but obviously you need to take the offense just ask him if he wants to go to bed and leave a cigg on the counter
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