I don't even remember his name...i'm just gonna save it as birthday sex
Like reprimanding the wall for "sneaking up on me" drunk
I'm drinking Dom Perignon from the bottle with a straw just to piss of some french dude.
It was like a lincoln log. Seriously. I don't know who's more pissed, me or my vagina...worst.hookup.ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he even offered to make my bed in the morning.
You've slept with me you know how lazy I am in bed.
Ja rule starts his prison sentence today #3475th reason we should drink tonight
So how exactly do I backtrack from motorboating and ass grabbing?
But on the plus side, what he lacked in size he made up for with speed. And grunting.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She had never heard the term "grundle" before. Classiest girl I've met in months
All this studying of HIV makes me want to have sex with you.
Moms love me. I'm the reminder that they need to turn safe search on.
I have unfollowed so many people the only things showing up in my newsfeed are dog rescues and sloth memes
How high?! We watched paid programming for 45 minutes before we realized it wasn't just a long commercial. So pretty high. The Bionic fish finder looks promising, though.
Lets get a boat first.
Well I thought I saw everything and then I saw Christmas themed poop bags at Petco.
Randomize