I bet they all look and smell like Amy Winehouse
we went to a bar last night, drank beer in plastic cups. I took pics w/a random kid i pulled into a photobooth & i have easy mac in my purse. I belong here.
I wish i could convert my hornyness to productiveness. I would have written a fucking book by now.
I'm glad I have good healthy relationships with my one night stands
We found her hiding in the bath tub.. And when i opened the curtain she replied "thank you" and walked out like nothing happened.
saying that you may be able to suck the gay out of me was just my way of getting a blowjob...thank you for the valiant effort.
I feel like I knew it was fucked up, but feared that god would take my dick away if I didn't use it last night.
Life gets in the way of sexy Saturday sometimes
That boy needs some memories to take back home with him
I like her. She smells like old lady but tastes like whiskey
His cat must have been laying on his dick, because now my face is covered in hives
Is it inappropriate to be Drs. Willy Fister and Jess Hewill as a couples costume for Halloween?
Oh we're gynecologists
I've lost every trace of self esteem. Even sneaking a BJ in the coffee room has lost it's luster.
What are you gunna do with your life today
put it back together
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
Randomize
