okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
I just tried to pee in a pad to see if it was like a diaper. it's not.
sticking your finger down your throat to make yourself throw up is bulimia, not morning sickness, so no, I don't think you're pregnant.
He saw my tits then looked up and yelled thank you jesus as loud as he could
the brownie started to kick in before i finished the essay... it became a race against my own increasing intoxication
Mother nature decided I wasn't going to be a whore today. Fuck her.
...But it's not like we would be the first people to pay for an abortion with student loans and cell phone rebates.
When we were fucking he said and I quote "we're like a sex fajita"
You could make a naked club. One member, you. One president, you.
Is it a bad thing that I've made out with everybody I work with?
.It's like gods test of willpower against vaginal comfort
Trying to Jedi mind trick myself into not throwing up. This is not the esophagus you are looking for.
Took his shirt off. Announced he was Jesus. Threw up. Asked me to cuddle him to sleep. And then tried to kiss me. Typical Saturday night.
On a scale of 1 to hungover I’m definitely throwing up at the office today.
I party with great urgency now.
Randomize
