I am I'm going to have heart failure he's peed on my life.
Pappa wants mamma naked
another moral hangover. fuck.
Your therapist is not going to think that you using your vagina as revenge is okay
just went back to the bar and asked if they found a shoe last night.
She grabbed both of our dicks in the pool then said repeatedly, "this is my dream, this is my dream,"
I just threw up blood. Also i just remembered i got hit in the face with a 2 by 4.
Mom said you looked used
You ass. You're not the one who bought me flowers, so obviously you will not be the recipient of the blow job of gratitude.
When I take mushrooms I can feel your presence down there. I can feel where Africa is too.
Apparently I still called the officer "sir" despite the fact I was at a .21 BAC. Southern girls are raised right
Dude random question. Where you with me when the vulture got electrocuted from the power lines and fell on the sidewalk in front of us?
So what if I got a tattoo on a bus, it was sterile.
1 why did you tell them where i peed last night and 2 where the fuck are you
Im so unlucky if I fell in a barrel of dicks, I'd come our sucking my thumb
Randomize
