..Thats also how I think I got the lyrics from MIAs Paper Planes Sharpeed on my ass? Maybe.
I wish there were whore gnomes that cleaned our apartment when we were gone.
What do you think that old couple was thinking when they saw me puking in the QT parking lot at ten in the morning?
windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
Ambien does the same to me. One time that I took it, I got this huge bowl of spaghetti out of the fridge and thought it was a castle and that the meatballs were little slaves. I ate all of them first and then the noodles were the soldiers and the sauce was the water in the moat. And when I finished, I fell up the stairs and threw it all up.
It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
i miss our vodka / percocet laundry days.
I just handed the barista at Starbucks a panty liner instead of my card....maybe I should upgrade this Tall to a Venti...
Her mom walked into the garage as we were smoking a kush blunt with sombreros on.
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
Can I just say how funny it is that your "respect" tattoo is right above the bruise from me slapping your ass
another side note: i'm officially selling my underwear on the internet
Well. Another one of my exes came out of the closet.
my friends roomated asked me this morning if we went to mcdonalds last night and i had no idea...that is until i checked my purse and found half a mcdouble in it...
Didn't know my clit could produce that many orgasms in one night. Fuck my husband; think I might have to become a lesbian.
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