i saw a guy balancing a black cat on his head last nite
get a pic
i tried he was too far away anotherguy was walking with paper bags on his feet explain that
i want ur life
the girl sitting next to me in class is using her birth control box as a ruler
After watching Cinemax for a few months, real porn just grosses me out.
i'm using a wine bottle as a spitter. how classy is that.
There is a distinct lack of front teeth here.
how did you get vomit on both your shoulders. I mean think about it.
The bald eagles cry cause u drink canadian beer.
Looking through my moms phone and find a pic if a dick. Scarred for life.
That's not as bad as watching a dumb ass drunk peeing into your window fan -
LET US USE OUR GENITALS TO CELEBRATE THIS VICTORY
I SHOULD NOT BE HAVING AN EXISTENTIAL CRISIS OVER PIZZA
This was the fourth year in a row I got arrested at Pride. Pretty sure that qualifies me as a legend.
Don't worry my mom is buying me a vasectomy for Christmas
He's talking about feelings now. I don't even know if he came???
How’d it go?
I accidentally joined a cult
So not great...
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