And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
What wine goes with Cap'n Crunch?
The iPad is going to make my porn collection SO much more glossier... thanks steve jobs.
Changed my sheets. Found a can of rockstar, crushed bag of tostitos, used tissues, and enough of both of our clothes to make a whole outfit.
I love online classes. Spent the last part of my lecture taking apart a teabag and filling it with weed.
you're the only person i know to use "jizz" and "cute" in the same sentence.
the higher we get, the more he looks like ray charles.
Remeber when I drunkenly made out with him this summer while he was getting bitched at by his girlfriend on the phone? Yeah, neither do I. But I'm pretty sure that same thing happened again last night.
he just used "boss" and "boner" in the same sentence. I cant respond.
A small child is toddling around the store, holding a coloring book and a shot glass. Thinking of you.
I just masturbated while eating dinner. Now who's the lazy one
Wasn't his fault he kicked a hole in the wall, they should have never tried to give him a bath after tequila.
I just got a job offer for Australia. Unfortunately I have given the name of Whitney
Jus had a dream that I borrowed bob dylans car to save us from a pack of raptors. Pretty stoked about it.
Tell me I'm drunk and you have to come get me. It's usually true. They'll believe you.
Randomize
