Just wanted to let you know that if you need my services as a male dancer for his birthday, let me kno so I can clear my schedule
You drink too much
No, I drink just the right amount - too often.
you want my honest opinion? I'm sure refering to her vagina as the "bat cave" was your first mistake.
I wish my dick could take responsibilities for his own actions
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Based on her brazillian stubble I would guess her plan had been to wait one more date before sleeping with me. Seems the plan was flexible.
Were you really trying to feed me potato chips while I was sitting on the toilet?
I need to find my pants, a way out of here, and a cheeseburger.
I should have questioned it early on when they said bring beer and chocolate syrup
Apparently campus cops frown on lighting a joint off of the eternal flame on Jerry Falwell's grave...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I HAVENT SEEN A PENIS IN 5 WEEKS I REFUSE TO REMAIN CALM
We're gonna start a pole dancing competition or a bar fight. Stand by for results.
Definitely ended up doing Coke with Chewbacca in the porta potty behind the haunted house.
all im saying is 27 is too old to still be drinking 40s, you make more money than me, buy some decent shit
screw you you golddigging beer snob
i’m blowing bubbles in my bloody mary so yeah it’s pretty much time to go
in the past 2 days I've ruined2-3 lives, made 2 men quit the bar, started a Wednesdays only affair, ended it, ruined that engagement and had my tires slashed by a jealous bouncer. please stop letting me out....
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