we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
he stopped making out with me and said "can I make you grilled cheese? I feel like I owe YOU something"
He just referred to his foreskin as a snuggie. Help.
Who topped off the "random beer mix" beer bong with a pinch of pepper?? All you could taste was busch and pepper...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just remembered seeing jalepenos in my vomit last night. Reminded me to thank you for sharing your queso with me. You're a good friend.
Boobs speak an international language.
Well, for starters, she called the condom a "dick mask."
She once gave me sex advice over the phone while intoxicated. So no you don't have the cooler therapist.
WTF YOU SHOULDNT BREAK A SWEAT TAKING A SHIT. MY BODY HATES ME.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hypothetically how does one go about throwing away a dildo?
I hope one day I make out with someone in a taco truck :(
I'm glad I inspire you to reach for the stars
Or a taco
Before getting out of the car, she said "Thanks for getting me off." I like how polite she is.
Just because you have put things in my vagina does not mean you know me
I know right. I don't even want to have sex today. I did anyway but that's besides the point.
Who in their right mind would frost a cake with their butt?
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